The Things That Last: Legacy Building Today

When we hear the word legacy, we often think about what someone leaves behind: a house, savings, jewelry, photographs or other treasured possessions. Those things certainly matter. But some of the most meaningful things we inherit from the people we love could never be listed in a will.

In Social Work Today, Meg Newhouse, PhD writes, “Legacy is as public as an architectural monument and as private as a letter written to children or grandchildren. It’s as tangible as a bank check and as intangible as a seemingly casual word of advice. And it’s as life enhancing as the Heimlich maneuver and as life denying as the Holocaust.”

Think about what has been passed down to you.

Maybe it is your grandmother’s recipe for biscuits, written on an index card with ingredients measured in handfuls rather than cups. Perhaps it is knowing how to grow tomatoes because your father taught you, or the particular way your family celebrates birthdays. It might be a saying you heard so often as a child that you now catch yourself repeating it to your own children or grandchildren.

These are pieces of legacy, too.

As we age, legacy becomes less about our physical stuff and more about what we have contributed. We leave behind stories, skills, traditions and values. We leave behind the ways we treated people and the relationships we nurtured. We may even leave behind a certain way of moving through the world.

Maybe you were the person who always made room for one more at the dinner table.

Maybe you taught your children that family shows up for one another, that work should be done well or that laughter is what sustains us through the hard times. You might have shown curiosity, generosity, faith, resilience or independence.

Often, we pass these things along without realizing we’re doing it.

But there becoming more intentional about legacy while we are still living it is powerful, too. Rather than asking, “What will people remember about me?” we can ask, “What am I teaching people through the way I live now?”

That shift turns legacy from something that happens after our lives into something we create during them. In fact, in research published in the journal Gerontologist, researchers who studied legacy and aging write, “Participants attained peace, realized their life was not complete, and were challenged to live intentionally through legacy creation.”

Preserving that legacy doesn’t necessarily require a big, focused project. It can be small and seemingly simple, but no less meaningful. Write down the recipe everyone asks you to make. Label the people in old photographs and add the story behind the picture. Record yourself telling a favorite family story. Teach a grandchild a craft or skill: how to sew, fish, garden, change a tire or make your famous Christmas candy. Write a letter explaining what you have learned about marriage, friendship, work, faith or surviving difficult times.

Most importantly, spend time with the people who matter to you. Some of our greatest legacies live in other people—in the confidence we encouraged, the kindness we demonstrated and the sense of belonging we created.

As you think about your own legacy, here are a few questions to think about:

• What do I know that I want someone else to know?
• Which family stories or traditions would I hate to see disappear?
• What values have guided my life?
• What has been my purpose throughout my life?
• What skills, recipes or knowledge could I intentionally teach someone?
• How do I hope people feel when they remember being with me?
• Is the way I am living today consistent with the legacy I hope to leave?

Legacy isn’t always what exists when we’re gone. It’s something we build, actively and often quietly, while we’re here.